Oh, does that matter?

From the Toronto City News:

It's usually the perfect combination - a loving youngster and a gentle dog.

But something went horribly wrong at an Oshawa home Tuesday and now a three-year-old girl is facing the possibility of having plastic surgery.

Police say the youngster was being cared for by neighbours at 506 Lanlark Drive just after 1pm, and was petting a normally friendly pit bull.

Cops aren't sure what provoked the animal, but it suddenly turned on the child, mauling the tot from her eye to her cheek.

The toddler was rushed to Lakeridge Health Centre, where plastic surgeons began examining the damage. It's believed her eyesight will be O.K. but she may require surgical repairs to her cheek.

The same people looking after the child were also looking after the dog for the day.

"They were petting the dog," relates Richard Ovila, the babysitter's husband. "I don't know if they were patting together or what, when all of a sudden the dog turned around and took her on the left cheek."

The dog has been seized by animal control and those who know the creature are baffled. Pit bulls are generally among the most gentle of dogs and are usually excellent with children.

"It was a very serious dog bite," confirms Dave Selby of Durham Regional Police.

The youngster was surprised by what happened and reportedly continually asked the doctors who were treating her why the dog bit her. But like police, they didn't have those answers, either.

"It's just a very unfortunate incident and obviously our thoughts and prayers are with that young girl right now to make sure she can get through this situation and hopefully not have too many damages as she grows older," Selby concludes.

It's not clear what will become of the canine, but the owner is the neighbour's son and he has no idea about what's happened to his beloved pet. He's currently away on vacation down south for March Break.

Authorities hope this tragic event will provide a lesson for others.

"The best thing to do is keep your children away from unknown dogs or strange dogs that you don't know their personality or behaviour," suggests Tre Smith of the Toronto Humane Society.

The little girl has been taken to the Hospital for Sick Children in Toronto for further assessment. She'll be staying there until at least Wednesday.

Something is off, you say?

Why, how could the gentle pet who "turned on" the toddler be a pit bull, when Ontario has criminalized them?

Where are the cries for the dog's death, the smug Itoldyasos, the obligatory accounts of locking jaws?

Why isn't anyone being investigated for dogfighting? Cited for harboring a vicious and dangerous animal?

Oh, sorry. My bad.

My computer must have a virus that searches text and autoreplaces. "Pit bull" for "golden retriever."

Feel better now? No?

This toddler will grow up with a scar on her cheek, and maybe her psyche, but secure in the knowledge that the Ontario government has wisely protected her from all possible harm.

The Thlot Pickens

Jake the biting Labrador is on the lam.

DES MOINES, Iowa - A Sioux City councilman's dog that has been deemed vicious and could be euthanized is missing from an animal shelter.

Police say someone broke into the shelter Sunday afternoon and stole Jake, a 3-year-old yellow Labrador retriever, from an outdoor kennel. No other animals were taken.

Lt. Mark Kirkpatrick says there are no suspects as of Monday and the dog hasn't been found.

Jake belongs to Councilman Aaron Rochester, who pushed last year for pit bull terriers to be banned from the city, saying they were too dangerous.

Jake was deemed vicious this summer after police say he bit a man June 27.

Rochester says he didn't take Jake.

He says his dog has been front-page news and he's not shocked that someone took him.

Pupdates

Another act here --

Almost No One Shows Up At City Council Meeting To Discuss Jake


Oh, for the love of doG, who is scripting this stinker?

It's not a conflict of interest if it isn't technically my dog

Snapshot Sunday*: Shop Dog

This lil' lizard-girl is the shop dog for a little gift shop on Main Street.

Yep, Zelienople has a Main Street. With a bakery, hardware store, diner, several banks, health-food store, pizza joint, drugstore and a rehabbed and just re-opening old movie theater. (It will be live theater now, and I hope some movies too.) And an Independence Day parade with fire trucks and weiner dogs and tractors and a 60-year-old majorette who does the splits and spins a flaming baton.

She came from a local shelter.** I waste no opportunity to remind her owner that he has won the dog lottery.

Oh, and it may not be immediately apparent from the cell-phone shot, but she's banned in Ontario, Britain, Sioux City, Denver. On account o' the baby-eating.

Too bad Zelie can't be safe like Denver.

*Once again, missed Photo Phriday

** The dog. Dunno about the majorette.

Updates on the Legal Front

Mary Wild, mistress of Tandoori-van canine cookery has been charged with eight counts of animal cruelty.

"Pit bull" hater and Sioux City councilman Aaron Rochester continues to appeal the designation of his neighbor-biting dog as "vicious and dangerous" -- while vowing to continue the city government's confiscation and murder legal ban on alleged "pit bulls" that never bit anyone. No mention of whether the city government has noticed that their law concerning dog bites is also completely deranged.

And finally ... drumroll please ... Linda Kapsa of Ballantine Montana has pleaded no contest to the felony animal cruelty charges against her.

Trust me, there will be plenty of updates in the coming weeks on this. But right at the moment, just read the Billings Gazette.

Vicious and Dangerous

"I have spoken with citizens who have had multiple problems with pit bulls. They've gone after people, dogs and even cats. They're an aggressive dog. Because of their strong bite, they can latch onto you or another animal and cause tissue damage."

-- Sioux City Councilman Aaron Rochester*

HT to Terrierman for this news story.

The city councilman who led the drive to ban pit bulls in Sioux City is waiting to find out whether his Labrador retriever will be euthanized for biting a neighbor.

Councilman Aaron Rochester said Tuesday he has appealed Sioux City Animal Control's determination that his family's yellow lab is vicious after Saturday's incident, which resulted in an emergency room visit and five stitches for the injured neighbor.

...

At 4:45 p.m. Saturday, a man and woman who live in the neighborhood walked by the Rochesters' home in the 1300 block of 46th St. The lab was sitting on the front porch. As the couple walked by on the sidewalk, the dog ran off the porch and jumped the man, Groetken said.

The neighbor suffered a scratch to his right leg as he tried to push the dog away, some marks on his chest and bites to his thumb that required five stitches at a hospital emergency room.

Yep, that's right. The man responsible for the homelessness and deaths of how many children's pets -- dogs that never bit anyone -- has been willfully harboring a vicious and dangerous dog.

"He is a great watchdog. My speculation is, he was watching our children and may have thought they were in danger."

Yes, Councilman, that is your feckin' speculation. Since you weren't home while you were casually breaking the leash law that is meant to keep us all absolutely safe all the time, it's quite reasonable to replace facts with this speculation --

That your loose, unsupervised, vicious dog has paranoid fantasies about innocuous neighbors out for a walk.

Since your own paranoid fantasies make it A-OK to kill other people's pets based on what you confabulate as their "breed," I guess it makes sense that your dog's paranoid fantasies make it just fine to go bite the passer-by who looks like he's got a panel van full of candy and a clown costume back home.

And, on a totally unrelated note, why is it that smug douchebags always own crazed untrained yellow Labradors named Jake?

Is it because they believe that such animals are idiot-proof? While this notion would reflect some unexpected self-awareness, it too is a fantasy. As Mr. Rochester has proven, idiots are far too ingenious.

Sorry Jake, you have to die because your owner is a jackass. And because you actually bit someone for absolutely no reason.

Unlike the other smooth-coated, square-headed dogs your owner has killed.


* Whose only other newsworthy career achievement seems to be voting to ban unapproved porch furniture that didn't come from Pottery Barn. 'Cuz that's just trashy.